Shout-outs to Chris Farley, David Spade, and Brian Fucking Dennehy. Tommy Boy, may you rest in peace. Thanks for the laughs.
I was ready to pick up the pen aka keyboard this morning. Hand to God I was going to knock out a half page or more on the short story/novel.
Unfortunately before I could dig in, I logged into Twitter and what did I see but another fucking school shooting.
Pardon the profanity.
It’s time to license guns like we license drivers in this country. If you want to own a hand-cannon designed only to kill another human being or an assault rifle that should only be in the hands of a soldier, that’s on you. I am not going to try and repeal your right to bear arms, but I am damn sure going to enact extensive regulation and taxation.
You will take a test every five years.
You will prove that you passed said test with an amendment to your drivers license.
You will undergo an initial psych evaluation and a re-evaluation whenever the best science states you should be re-tested.
You will be tracked through a federal database every time you purchase a gun or ammunition.
My family and I deserve no less given the destructive capability of your expression of an antiquated Constitutional right.
You have the right to keep and bear arms, but I have the fucking right to try to give my kids the best chance possible to not get shot while going to fucking college.
Hallelujah! Holy shit! Where’s the Tylenol?